Friday 4 January 2013

New Year Promises



I'm not big into resolutions I don't stick to them and I think sometimes when I make them I know secretly that I won't achieve them as I don't have the heart to do it or they just aren't achievable!

Last year I was in a bit of a funny place I really wanted to do something big and achieve something, so of course I decided to do a zip wire from the top of the Baltic art gallery across the river Tyne, if you don't know Newcastle the Baltic is a very tall building! I was absolutely petrified of doing it and got cold sweats just thinking about it, so when my friend at work dropped out I saw that as my way out and I was so relieved but then I just beat myself up because I didn't do it, even though I didn't really want to do it in the first place!

So this year I'm wanting to work on more long term changes that aren't just knee jerk reactions on the 1st January that I will hopefully stick to, these are things that I had started to work on before the start of 2013 and I'm hoping to carry on this year.

Get Healthy
For the past couple of months I have been going to Slimming World and have managed to loose one stone, I'm really pleased but I know I could have done better, I constantly sabotage myself and then beat myself up about it, which leads to my weight yo-yoing constantly, I have lost 2 stone and then gained it all back again soo many times. I'm pleased with my achievement  but I know if I had stuck to my diet properly or even just a bit better I could have been nearer my goal instead I kept finding reasons why I needed a chinese takeaway or pizza.
However I am pleased that even when I have been off the wagon I have managed to maintain my weight instead of putting it all back on again, so I am hopeful that I am starting to put my yo-yoing behind me, so that is my goal, yes I want to loose weight but more importantly I want to stop beating myself up when I make mistakes so that I can be healthier and maintain my weight instead of going off the deep end.
I've been doing slimming world with my mam so I think being able to support each other has really helped. 

Be more confident in my career
When I started my new outreach job earlier this year, I was surprised that I was able to actually do the job! I had been working in as part of a small close-knit team in my previous role and now I was working independently, so although techincally I can do the job I was worried that I relied on my colleagues for advice and support too much, and I wouldn't be able to do it on my own.
But I did, and I feel proud of the work I have achieved since starting the role and the support that I have given to people to help them to make changes in their lives.
This year as part of my role I am going into the local college to speak to students to raise awareness of Domestic Abuse and unhealthy relationships, I am absolutely petrified at talking in front of a large group of people, just thinking about it makes me feel very anxious.
I know I can do it, but I constantly question and doubt myself, so this year I want to work on banishing my confidence demons and trust in my abilities more. 

Blogging
I want to be more confident in my blogging abilities. 
Rachel has always been more creative than me and has more skills in photography, I have always assumed that most of the good things about the blog have been down to Rachel, and I'm the sidekick who is obsessed with all things beauty but doesn't have the skills yet to make it great. Rachel has never made me feel this way but it is how I felt. 
If you are an avid reader of the blog you may have noticed that there haven't been many posts from Rachel in the past few months, Rachel has had a few things change in her personal life so hasn't had as much time available to focus on the blog. So I was left in the position of leave it until I can blog again with Rachel or keep going on my own, I kept going on my own and it made me realise I can do it. I cringe a bit when I look at posts from the first couple of months of the blog, they are really bad, but it helps me see how far we have come with the blog.
So this year I want to focus more on blogging, I love writing the blog, but I'm not very organised and often don't know what to write, so I want to get a blogging notebook to write down ideas and keeps notes when I am trialing new products, I'm hoping this will help to make me feel more inspired and focused on developing our blog.

What are your New Year Resolutions?

Also would you interested in posts about my journey with weight loss? or has this been overdone?

Elaine

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